Russian Women At A Glance
There are now so many Russian women on the net that the bottom has dropped out of the market. But who are these chicks, and what makes them ‘tchik‘ ? Here finally is your comprehensive, at-a-glance, cut-out-and-keep guide.
Mealchiks
Always pleased to meet you at the Radisson or Metropole. Mealchicks are professional social goers and the type of girl who gets a last-minute call from a dating agency when somebody hasn’t bothered emailing or needs a back-up. Will become moody and withdrawn without shopping therapy.
Distinguishing features: Short skirt, high heels, sexy foreign accent
Tripchiks
Like Mealchiks, but focussed on holidays. Tripchiks have usually graduated to mailing Western men after sponsored trips to Turkey, Cyprus or Cuba. They pose on the net as candidate brides and the idea to meet in an exotic country will usually come from them. Invariably skinny, tripchiks may be easily confused with matchchiks.
Distinguishing features: Short skirt, high heels, sexy foreign accent
Sputchiks
Upwardly mobile and just as goal-oriented as their Western counterparts. Sputchicks already speak English well and have a good idea of where they’re going, usually as models or tennis players. Sputchicks can make good partners but only if you can keep up with them and fund their many aspirations.
Distinguishing features: Short skirt, high heels, sexy foreign accent
Romanchiks
Romanchiks have waited all their lives to be rescued by a Western man. They want someone who will suddenly wave a magic wand and change their whole miserable existence. Unfortunately, romanchiks have never thought beyond this scenario and are hopelessly unprepared for an equally miserable life in the West.
Distinguishing features: Short skirt, high heels, sexy foreign accent
Aggravatchiks
These chicks come across as just ordinary women from ordinary Soviet apartment blocks. Practised liars, they will do or say anything, and very convincingly, to get their kids, old mother, relations and money out of Russia. Unless you have a degree in street savvy you’ll be taken in.
Distinguishing features: Short skirt, high heels, sexy foreign accent
Dipchiks
Russian dipchiks play the net for options. They have usually been on and off the net for some time, while between lovers and ex-husbands. Dipchicks will happily string along and play off valuta suitors - Russian and Western - in their futile attempt to become lucky dipchicks.
Distinguishing features: Short skirt, high heels, sexy foreign accent
Kwikchiks
Kwikchiks are the kind of Russian girls who say, ‘I’m not so desperate that I’ll say yes to the first man who comes along’, but always do. They gravitate towards men who say, ‘I’m not so desperate that I’ll propose to the first Russian girl I meet’, but always do. There isn’t a lot you can say about kwikchiks because it all happens horribly quickly.
Distinguishing features: Short skirt, high heels, sexy foreign accent
Dear Mr Dude,
Thank you. I was beginning to suffer dyev withdrawal symptoms after only 3 months out of the country. Thank you for the smile.
It’s very good to hear from you, Ruminator. Your blog is missed.
Yes, Dyev culture is addictive and, since you spent a decade or so in Russia, it is nice that you recognise these fun types. It took me awhile. There was an Eagles reunion concert where Don Henley announced a song (The Heart of The Matter) : ‘ . . . it took 40 years to write and about 4 minutes to sing.’
Hope you get to write again soon.
The Angelchick is a missing category. The ones that rush to save the wounded birds of all nationalities. The self-sacrifice gene of Zoya Kosmodenyanskya speaking… Distinguished features: invisible wings.
hi
are you telling me there are no girls who want to get married. girls who are marriage material must be there two
Very entertaining!
If you removed the noun Russian and replaced it with American/Australian/English it would fit just as well.
Though, as a fella I would like to suggest that the guys do lift their game a bit. Being a smelly, untidy, shiftless, and thoughtless slob is not a good look.
But don’t get me wrong here. I don’t want to go out with someone who wears lipstick and high heels and is more like a man than most men. No thanks.
I’ve gotten to the position at this time of my life that women are of no interest to me. The physical attraction is still immense. But I know they are going to start talking when they wake up next to me in the morning. And even though I’m a white, heterosexual male; I’m not that stupid.
I think it was in the Old Testament somewhere, where the Lord prophesied that he would “redeem the daughters of Zion”. Well, I sure look forward to that because Christ is the only one that can do it.
God bless us all boys.
The whole discussion is entertaining and look forward to amend and also put in consideration before it is too late.
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